If Historical Figures Were Alive Today: Plato

Plato: Hey, United States… … Wait… you have a Democratic Republic? Never mind. You’re doing it right. Though, to be fair, you all are still far too concerned with your lust of goods and not of knowledge; you still fight wars you don’t know how to win that are pointless anyway; you keep electing exceedingly […]

If Historical Figures Were Alive Today, Week 3

Jesus Christ: Oy vey. You fight wars in my name, put words in my mouth, and hypothesize on things I would or would not do. BITCH, YOU DON’T KNOW MY LIFE…. What you do know was documented by people who knew me. Not by myself. That’s like trusting Gossip Girl for your information about Serena. […]