If Historical Figures Were Alive Today, Week 3

Jesus Christ: Oy vey.
You fight wars in my name, put words in my mouth, and hypothesize on things I would or would not do.  BITCH, YOU DON’T KNOW MY LIFE…. What you do know was documented by people who knew me. Not by myself. That’s like trusting Gossip Girl for your information about Serena. Gossip Girl may know Serena, but she isn’t Serena! God, that’s a great show.


Stained glass at St John the Baptist's Anglica...
This is his look of polite condescension.


Writer’s note: This is not entirely designed to offend any (or every) audience. I have great respect for Jesus. I have no respect for Gossip Girl. I am not affiliated with any organized religion, but I do believe that Jesus was a pretty awesome dude, rocking the long hair, beard, and birkenstocks two millennia  before hipsters claimed them as their motifs. If you are offended… don’t read my other If Historical Figures Were Alive Today.





4 thoughts on “If Historical Figures Were Alive Today, Week 3

Jump in; the water's fine!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s