The Problem of Urgency: Stories from #AWP15, Deuce

You’re all gonna hate me for the pun in the title of this piece, but just deal with it, okay? I got my writing done by the time I said I would. In fact, the reason I haven’t posted part two yet is because I’ve been having SO much fun writing my thesis that by […]

An Open Letter to US Airways

Dear Flight Attendant on flight 2026 from Phoenix to Philadelphia last Friday, February 27th, at 11:50 PM: If you have to open a sentence with, “I’m not a bitch, but…” guess what? You’re a bitch. Also, you’re a flight attendant and you’re working and you probably shouldn’t be using that kind of language. This isn’t […]

Live A Little

Welcome back, friends! Back where? you ask, confused. You didn’t go anywhere. I went somewhere. You know, for a person who generally doesn’t like going out, meeting new people, trying adventure sports without an ambulance and a stretcher waiting nearby, spending money, or getting out of my comfort bubble, sometimes I really surprise myself. And then […]

On the First Day of Whitsmas: Travel Time

My true love didn’t give me squat. Atreyu gave me a big ol’ kiss on the nose, though. I think he found a booger, because he was very satisfied. In a few hours, I will embark upon the 32-hour drive back to the Mile High City. I can’t tell you how excited I am. Before […]

St. Christopher Says… Screw You

St. Christopher is the patron saint of travel. He’s the guy you pray to to make sure you arrive at location B safe and sound, and that your journey from A to B is full of exactly what you want it to be full of. He’s the one to make sure you don’t get a […]

Travel Tip #1: Haikus

Batman fights crime and I fight bad attitudes and together we win Delta Airlines is limbo for world travelers and eats people’s souls Delta Airlines should be called Delta Disasters: Fuck Your Travel Plans gingerbread cookies can only soothe a troubled mind to an extent AND COMING SOON: Travel Diaries #2: Amsterdamnit, part one! […]

Travel Tip #1: Don’t Be A Buttface

As I sat in the airport at midnight during the fourth hour of our delay, I learned the first rule of travel: don’t be a bitch. No, seriously. Don’t be one. No entity cares about your travel plans. Not God, or Jesus, or that chocolate cake beckoning you from the corner over there. So when […]

The Prodigal Daughter Returns! (An Exercise in Modesty… Just Kidding)

Well, HELLO, beautiful loves! You’re looking svelte! Is that a new haircut? New shirt? New laptop? Whatever you’ve done, it’s working. Let me start with a brief apology: I’m sorry I fell off the face of the internet. Traveling through Europe, I discovered that I did not have consistent internet access, nor the time to […]

Look what I got you!

I went to Brugge and decided to get each of my followers a present. Boy, do they melt in your mouth.

European Adventures

Hello, beautiful readers! It is I, Whitney, your blog overlord/best friend/unicorn enthusiast. Today, I leave for Europe. Hold the screams and the tears. This doesn’t mean I’m going to completely stop blogging (although it may seem like I have). In fact, it’s quite the opposite. I will be writing.A lot. Well, maybe not a lot. […]