You Asked, and I Answered

Warning: I say swear words a couple of times in this post. Like, actually say them. Because this is a video of me. Thanks all for your questions! It’s a long video, but I hope you stick around until the end. Because I do something spectacularly nerdy for all of you. Also there is a […]

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly (And the Whitney)

A few days ago, I was completely shocked and astonished when I checked my blog and noticed that we had past the 5,000 followers mark. FIVE-THOUSAND PEOPLE FOLLOW ME?! Holy balls. That’s a lot. It’s an incredible feeling to know that this little blog that I started a year and a half ago has created […]

Surprise!

Generalized Anxiety Disorder and surprises don’t go well together. As a child, my brothers capitalized on this: they would wait, patiently, silently, behind doors or corners and pop out to yell in my face. It worked like a charm and produced the desired effect of tears, and made me paranoid to the point where I […]

The Mom and A Whit In Black: Guest Blog

Hey, gang! Make your way over to The Mom In Black for a special guest post on what my children are like! (Newsflash: I don’t have any children. Unless you count all the half-children swimming around in my ovaries, and the other half of those children swimming around in some stranger’s cojones… GROSS. I’m going […]

If Historical Figures Were Alive Today: Richard Pryor

Ah, If Historical Figures Were Alive Today. How I’ve missed you. For those of you who don’t know, I’m a psychic medium able to communicate with the dead. that’s approximately 90% bullshit and 10% truth. The 10% comes from all the times I played the Ace Game or with the Ouiji board in middle school. […]

Two-Year Clottiversary

A lot of my anxiety as a child resulted in me believing I would die in horribly tragic ways. For instance, I was terrified of sleeping under my ceiling fan because I believed that it would crash through my bed, chop me into little pieces, and send my remains and my bed through the floor […]

Storytime: The Art of Anxiety and Creation

It’s been a while, I know. And I don’t even have an excuse to offer you. I’ve been working only four days a week. I’ve been exercising six days a week (yay, fending off depression!) and generally doing summer-type activities. There are no reasons for why I shouldn’t have posted more frequently, or gone on […]

The Big One: Body Image

This is less of a phobia, and more of obsessive-compulsive tendencies. There is still anxiety wrapped around everything related to each little tic of mine, in fact, more anxiety than troubles me about anything else. Am I working on it? Yes. Am I succeeding? In some areas, hell yes. In other areas, I haven’t made […]

Unit 3: Creative Nonfiction Writing (A Year-End Reflection)

When Friday gets here, I will officially be done with my first year of teaching. My first year of instructing the bright minds of America’s future leaders… Hopefully. That is, if I did my job well. Or, if they have any ambition. That remains to be seen with certain students. I’ve learned a lot this […]

A Piece of Paradise: Taking Le Clown on a Tour of Le Denver

Well, hello there, attractive readers! May I suggest you mosey on over to A Clown On Fire and check out this post on my city of origin, Denver. You won’t be disappointed. I spent a long time trying to capture the essence of this town, and I think I did a damn good job. Also, […]