This is a blog about fear.
To be more specific: this is a blog about what it’s like living with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I won’t lie to you, I’m not an expert on the topic. I’m just a young woman who lived with the disorder undiagnosed for a bit over fourteen years.
Anxiety disorders or mental illnesses of any kind, are a serious business. If you think you may suffer from some kind of disorder, talk to someone about it. Seek help. Don’t think taking medication makes you any less of a human being. Medication isn’t a bad thing, it’s there to fix what’s going haywire in that brain of yours.
I have been (mostly) happily medicated for going on seven years now. That, and the amazing ability of hindsight, has allowed me to look back on the things that used to scare me and laugh. For instance, I used to be terrified of the shapes in the plaster of my walls in my bedroom coming alive and killing me. No, I’m not kidding. That was a real fear that kept me awake at night, staring at the outline of what looked like a pig with a really gigantic head.
Well, sure, you think, when I was five I was terrified of the plaster shapes, too. Ah, yes. But were you still scared of them when you were 11? How about 14? Yeah, I didn’t think so. I named that gigantic pigheaded monstrosity in hopes that when it finally came to life, it would appreciate my kindness and decide not to slaughter me and my family and leave the cats and dogs to feast on our remains.
So this blog will be for stories about the different inane, insane fears I had growing up. I hope to make you laugh, cry, and maybe reevaluate your position on medication and those of us that need (yes, need) it. Of course, this blog will still include stories that may or may not be included in the final manuscript of my first memoir, but know that the stories of my very real fears are making up a book of their own (tentatively titled: It Would Be Tragic if It Weren’t So Funny)