Once Upon a Time

I have told this story millions of times. I have written in approximately thirty times. I condensed those thirty pages into one piece. And then I edited and revised the shit out of it, because that’s what it takes to be a real writer. (That’s what the professionals tell me, anyway. A lot of the […]

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An Open Letter to US Airways

Dear Flight Attendant on flight 2026 from Phoenix to Philadelphia last Friday, February 27th, at 11:50 PM: If you have to open a sentence with, “I’m not a bitch, but…” guess what? You’re a bitch. Also, you’re a flight attendant and you’re working and you probably shouldn’t be using that kind of language. This isn’t […]

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Head on Over to Brews and Views

A week ago a STRANGER emailed me. Thankfully that email didn’t contain any puppy gifs or I’d probably be cyberkidnapped. But that stranger wanted to interview me! So, readers, friends, family, mortal enemies… head on over to Brews and Views  to learn a little bit more about yours truly.   PS–The semester is over and I’m […]

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I love you guys. No, really.

We did it. Rather, you did it. I just occasionally typed some things and made myself giggle and hopefully made you giggle, too. And it worked. Because you know what, we just reached 10,000 followers last week. Let me say that again: TEN-THOUSAND MOTHERFUCKING FOLLOWERS THAT ARE SO MUCH MORE AWESOME THAN I WILL EVER BE. […]

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I have a theory

about cars. You know, those giant machines of destruction that we pretend are for transportation? Yeah, those.   Have you ever noticed how being in a car turns you into an unaccountable rage monster? Like, someone cuts you off in traffic, and you yell terrible things like, “WHAT THE BALL-BURN ARE YOU THINKING YOU SHIT […]

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